Chedderman: First Brit was Black

When science and history are combined they area a wonderful, almost irrefutable phenomena. This was particularly so yesterday when the very clever people from the Natural History Museum unveiled what they described as the first modern Brit 10,000 years ago, was Black. Their scientific DNA rigor allowed them to confidently say that the remains , found in a cave in Cheddar, -thus the ‘Cheddar man’- was not as many would have expected, -a white Nordic type-, but rather black skinned, African nose with, interestingly, blue eyes.

Think about for a second. The first Brits were as Black as any African you’d find on that continent, only Cheddar man’s eyes and straight-ish hair might suggest a European transformation was in fact already taking place.

For the xenophobes and bigots such as Nick Griffin, Paul Golding and Tom Robinson this must be their worst nightmare. These race hate mongers have spent their whole lives telling anyone who will listen that the British isles has only been for white people, and it should stay that way now. Now they will have to recalibrate their life’s hateful mission to the irrefutable fact that there’s every possibility they are the true descendents of a relatively recent Black British man-Chedderman. What a total head spin for the bigots.

Can I suggest the next time you bump into the likes of Griffin and Golding we give them a fist bump with the greeting ; “Yo Fam!, Wagwan! You seen our Bredren down there in Devon recently. He needs a trip to the barbers, fix up his weaves .”

Simon Woolley